Final Year

well it has been over a year since I last post in here. the reason why I make a comeback is no other than that I'm having a writer's block in terms of writing my thesis for my final year project. So, I thought, why not I pay my blog a visit? Along with the surprise visit, I thought, how about I try to crammed myself up with a new post in my blog? so yeah, that explains everything I guess.

Just like any other year, we all have some tough times to go through.

This year, I was hospitalized for having bad mental health. Okay.. it was just a joke! but still please take care of your mental health peeps (says someone who doesn't really have a stable mental health herself). Anyway, I was hospitalized because my physical health decided to go down the hill and luckily it all happened during my semester break so no excuse can be made in terms of saying that it all makes it hard for me to finish my degree HAHA. Biotechnology is killing me. Everything felt extra hard as ever! I cried a lot when I'm preparing for my fyp proposal (100pages of proposal report gais extra tak extra?). Fast forward to 4 months later, I turned out to be somewhat a serial killer for 30 sprague dawley rats for the sake of fyp. This year, I grew apart with a few close friends.

But!

This year I spent so many quality times with my family. I love disturbing my parents on whatsapp saying quite a lot of things like bila yah tak balik, semua nak pergi jalan jalan/bila yah kat rumah takde pun makan makanan favourite yah/abah takde pun nak visit yah kat uni/bla bla bla and I kept on saying those things until my parents takes it seriously that they keeps on asking me what I wanted to do or have whenever I went home. But it was fun because it feels like I'm their favourite child HAHAHAHA... I also love when my only brother do errands for me because I gets to be the boss. And I also love when my brother cooks maggi or frozen foods for me because dia buat lagi sedap. I love to talk girly stuff with angah, having girlish type of activities with angah like lulur badan/waxing time and I love it when I selalu lupa beli tiket bas balik rumah awal awal until tiket bas habis, angah selalu ambil dekat depan pagar college without complain. I love it when kakak makes a surprise visit for me at my uni, belanja me everytime she received her salaries, allowing me to do makeup at her face and always makes family as her priority. I love it when I have those moment when I don't feel like wearing my clothes, I barge into my youngest sister's room just to borrow her clothes and I love to usik her of being slightly bigger than me hahaha. when I'm not with my family, I spent almost the entire year with aisyah. she's always there whenever I was having an emotional breakdown especially when I'm having a problems with running my fyp labwork. She even provides me with lots of chocolate and snacks from Ina Shoppe just to make me feels better and life at campus felt more fun with her, we always did fun things together because we kind of have the same interest. I'm so going to miss her when life at uni ends. I even manage to keep up with my bestfriends Aini, Laila, Mina, Ain, and Nadia through whatsapp and dm. Besides that, I grow closer to Nurin and Yaa. Nurin even became my roommate this semester. I got closer with BSB batchmates. I also manage to gather tons of memories with Genesis people. I got my driving license after I kept on delaying it because I don't feel like attending driving classes (and obviously I had to because my parents paksa). Reconnected with old friends during Raya. Catching up with high school friends. Entered my final year of Degree on September 2018.

There's so many good memories that I can highlight but my main point is that Alhamdulillah the good always outweighs the bad. I learnt of how important it is to be transparent about my mental health in order to be better. I learnt to accept criticism and remind myself not to repeat the same mistakes again. I know how to appreciate people more and get rid of toxic people especially yang selalu point out salah kita without realizing their own mistakes and fitnah kita macam macam and selalu ditch kita for someone else. it might still be early for me to say this but rasanya next year pula kut baru post lagi haha.. anyway, 2018 is just another year of living in my 20's and I'm proud to say that I got over the hard times successfully and I learned a lot about myself.

I hope a lot of you too have a good year. It may be an exhausting year for you, maybe it had really been overwhelming, but you're still here, you made it this far and I believe you will made it in the future too. For those who are still struggling in life, may we all be at peace and be healed, insyaAllah.

Thank you for reading.